Fa una bella Figura
(Elegance is more in our way of being than in the dress we wear)
Travel can be a great teacher
We’ve been learning about Fa una Bella Figura.
Bella figura has many possible definitions. It’s about presentation; appearance, conduct and making a good impression. I asked a friend to explain it simply. His response; “be your best, behave well, be kind”.
Fa una Bella Figura is very much part of life in this region of Italia and very much part of the psyche of the people to this day.
The more I began to understand ‘Fa una Bella Figura’, the more I saw it in action.
These are not orchestrated acts of kindness, or a prescribed way of behaving on a particular day. This is every day friendliness, generosity and consideration for others.
A while ago, Italy experienced the coldest May on record in over 60 years. ‘Maltempo’. We had just travelled from Rome, and as we stepped off the bus, the skies opened and cold, torrential rain fell upon us. We looked at each other with disbelief. But within seconds, two strangers came towards us with umbrellas, one wearing shorts and running barefoot. We stood there, under their umbrellas, watching the rain, wishing it would stop. A few minutes later, the man returned, now with shoes on and his car keys, saying he would drive us. We said no, no need, but he insisted. Molto gentile.
On another day, and another bus, I watched the unprompted actions of a young man sitting at the very front. When an old lady got on board, he promptly got up, carried her shopping to that front seat, then moved himself to another seat, further back.
We invited a friend and his fiancé for lunch. He didn’t simply turn up with a bottle of wine. He presented us with a beautifully wrapped food hamper, filled with a selection of local delicacies.
We hadn’t planned to be in Italy in the middle of winter. But the Coronavirus pandemic and travel restrictions meant we stayed put. And after the first snow fall, the gas meter got stuck. You can imagine what happened. The gas suddenly ran out. We called the company. They have a truck that calls by when it’s in the vicinity, to refill the gigantic outdoor gas tank. Meanwhile the log fire fire roared on. We put on layers. And we waited. Neighbours called down with a bag of warm, cooked food; lentils, potatoes, vegetables and eggs. They were so concerned that we couldn’t cook anything hot. We thanked them profusely.
And just recently, at the end of a journey, the bus driver pulled up, and as we all got off I greeted him “come stai?” He smiled and said, “you always ask how I am! “Certo”. Of course! What came next was a surprise; “un cafe per lei?” Yes, the bus driver was offering to buy us coffee during his break. We politely declined. PKP said to him “Gentile”. “Belissima” We all laughed.
And Fa una bella Figura applies to animals too. We found out about the kindness of strangers towards a lost dog. We nicknamed him Patzo (crazy). He’s a little excitable. Each day, the people in the village would leave out food for him. And he was given a place to stay, in one of the out buildings of a nearby farm.
Large celebrations that use fireworks can be fun for us but terrifying for animals. And so people in the town of Collecchio, decided to do something about this. New legislation was passed, stating that people must use silent fireworks, which will reduce the stress caused to animals.
We’re entranced by this gentile approach to treating others, long lost in many other places. And we can learn from it.
Maybe something has been lost in some societies, which are so money oriented and where there’s the constant quest for cheap. Sometimes cheap is expensive. Perhaps all of this can have repercussions on our psyche and communities. While so many are rushing to grab more and make more, somehow society becomes a little less. Might something be lost along the way? It can result in a kind of poverty of spirit. A lack of soul.
And it lacks refinement.
The proverb sums it up; L’eleganza è nel nostro modo di essere più che nell’abito che indossiamo. (Elegance is more in our way of being than in the dress we wear). One might be draped from head to toe in designer wear, be perfectly presented, or drive the newest car. But how do they live life? How do they treat others?
What lessons have you learned from travel?
© Maggie M / Mother City Time
This is beautiful, Maggie. Thank you for such a complimentary portrayal of the amiable and cordial people of my Gram and Pap’s home country. Bella Figura is so very valuable, especially now, as we help each other through the trying and uncertain times of the pandemic. Thank you for sharing this beautiful sentiment with your readers. Always a pleasure and treat to hear from you.
Che Dio vi benedica! 🙏❤️
Marla
Ciao Bella,
I’m glad that you enjoyed reading this. This is our honest experience from spending time in the region. Maybe it is different in other parts of the country. But as you know, this part of Central Italy is very special. Thinking back, you were the only person we know, who had heard of Abruzzo. And you were the first person to plan a visit. Yes, Bella Figura is so important. Your Gram and Pap Berarducci would be proud of you. You carry Bella Figura in your heart, and you show such generosity to others, wherever you are.
Thank you for your comment, Marla.
Un grande abbraccio per te.
What lovely anecdotes Maggie! 💜 Such positive stories to warm the heart 😊 You have such a good eye for small detail and collect them so beautifully 🤗 It reminded me of something I have enjoyed locally to us recently. We may not have such a lovely phrase to describe it but we definitely have individuals who embody “Bella Figura”. Our community has just experienced the sad loss of such an individual who touched the lives and hearts of many thousands of individuals including our own family. He was unassuming and publicity averse but tireless in helping those less fortunate in our community…often opening up his own home when the homeless shelter he managed was full, organising a Christmas meal every year for over 100 lonely local people also welcoming anyone who wished to volunteer to help and cooking meals twice a week for anyone who needed them, amongst many other deeds. He never turned anyone away and was tireless in his creativity to help where needed. He was a local celebrity and a true gent – although he’d probably reject both those terms!! When he passed away someone set up a facebook page for people to share their personal memories of him ….it has been overwhelmed with personal anecdotes spanning more than 40 years!! It is going to be made into a tribute book for his family but it has been so wonderful to read all these examples of kindness in our local community and to see what an amazing difference one person can make in the world by just rolling up their sleeves and thinking of others! It has been very moving sharing these memories with strangers across our county. It has certainly inspired us all who new him to employ a little more “bella figura”! Thanks for sharing this positive piece Maggie 🥰 xxx
Thank you for your kind comments, Ceri. I’m so glad that you enjoyed this piece. It sounds like the gentleman in your community definitely embodied “Bella Figura”. And it’s fitting that these people should be valued in their communities and remembered. That’s wonderful that the community are collating people’s comments and personal anecdotes in tribute to him, which the family are sure to appreciate. Yes, individuals can make such a difference to the lives of others. I’m immediately reminded of the words of Cape Town VIP, Archbishop Desmond Tutu: “Do your little bit of good where you are; it’s those little bits of good put together that overwhelm the world”. I never lose faith that a better world is possible and we can all play our part in making that happen. Thank you so much for taking time to comment, Ceri. May you keep finding examples of “Bella Figura” where you are.